


The Red Sea

by JaxJasiroth



Category: Burger King "The Burger King" Commercials, Chester Lockhart - Fandom, Teletubbies (TV), The Wacky Adventures of Ronald McDonald (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Gen, Immortals, Implied Sexual Content, Murder, Other, Pettiness, Vampires, affair, ooooh, wecan be immortals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 12:40:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29296044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaxJasiroth/pseuds/JaxJasiroth
Summary: Chester has an encounter with an ex, and Tinky Winly gets caught in the madness
Relationships: Chester lockhart x Tinky Winky
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	The Red Sea

At only 394 years old, Chester Lockhart was a widow. They never thought it’d happen, not to them; that was always something that happened to other people. The shock making them surprisingly calm, Chester looked down at their hands, surprised to see Tinky’s blood coating them in ugly, inane splotches that left track marks over the beautiful, pale fingers; blots of ink ruined the most perfect canvas. 

The Burger King grinned up at Chester from the ground in the alleyway, fangs bared for the world to see, Tinky’s blood and brain matter pooling across the floor, branching off as it encountered obstacles. Chester was Moses, parting the Red Sea as their partner’s blood reached their feet, but this moment in time was Godless. 

**_24 hours earlier_ **

Chester let out a small scream as tears of frustration pooled in their eyes and hoisted themselves onto the vanity to get closer to the mirror, long legs draped over the edge of the counter. They were late. Fuck! Again! They were fucking late and it was because of this fucking makeup. Taking on the Ronald McDonald persona had been the worst idea Chester had ever had and every single day as they rose to get ready at 4 am, they regretted it. Were they improving the world? Inspiring smiling children everywhere to buy more Mcdonald’s and support their namesake foundation? Not really. Were they getting enough sleep? Also, no. 

Chester had been so wrapped up in their petty thoughts that they never heard Tinky's approach, short for Tinky Winky of course. The large, purple former Teletubby wrapped their paws around them and pulled them into the soft pudge of their chest in one quick, easy motion as to not disturb the annoyed clown. Chills ran down Chester’s spine, overpowering the slight twinge of annoyance at being interrupted when they were already late. Tinky towered over them at a full 7 feet, compared to Chester’s mere 5’11, but it comforted them. The warmth and soft fat and latent sexual tension that existed between them at this moment were enough to make the tears, and frustration, dry up completely and Tinky smiled. They always knew just what Chester needed and the slight smile lighting up Ttinky’s face said more than words ever could.

As Tinky released them from the embrace, Chester determinedly going back to work, full of much more confidence, they thought of how the two of them had met. For sure, at first glance, they were an odd couple, but they worked so well together. They were soulmates. Chester was slender and petite, passing much more for a human than most. Meanwhile, Tinky Winky was completely agender, pudgy, soft, warm, and standing tall with a large triangle on their head. There was a small box in their belly that functioned as a human TV, but it provided a good deal of Tinky’s power through photosynthesis. But even after 100 years of marriage, Chester was still

ars of marriage, Chester was still pretty uncertain as to what Tinky’s actual powers were.

Actually, Chester knew very little about Tinky’s past. They knew that Tinky was an integral part of the children’s black and white television show, the Teletubbies. When the show had been canceled, for reasons as vague as the oddly terrifying plot, Tinky and their siblings had been shunned and outcast by society. The general assumption had been that the Teletubbies were men and women in suits, and the humans, as well as the government, had been horrified to learn that there were real flesh and bone under there. It wasn’t a suit and a giant baby was living in the sun. Tinky had gone on the run and there, they’d met Chester. The two made an odd couple for sure, but they had one rock-solid thing in common.

Humans didn’t like anything they didn’t understand and not being understood got you killed. 

Throughout their musing of the history with their spouse, Chester had finished up the makeup and completed the persona they attached to themselves every day.

The clown.

The magician.

The mascot, feeding on the souls of the damned.

Only one of those was true, but unfortunately, they still had to wear these ridiculous oversized shoes and the horrifyingly ugly pin-striped yellow and white Hamburglar suit. With a final sigh, a glance of the watch, and a kiss blown over their shoulder, Chester was out the door and ready to cheer up some kids. They fixed their makeup as they walked, glancing into the little compact mirror, but mostly working by memory. Who didn’t give a little morning head before they left for work? Besides, Twinky liked how it looked when Chester’s makeup was smeared and mascara running. Tinky liked knowing that they could place Chester in an adorable state of careful ruin. And, Tinky really liked knowing that Chester was theirs.

Before Chester could finish the thought, they stopped in their tracks, head spinning. Was that…..the Burger King? Their ex?? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. He’d told Chester he’d moved. That he'd never spoken to Chester again. Why was the little creep Here? When he told Chester that he’d leave forever, Chester had believed him. They’d hoped for it. Why did weird little twerps never stick to their promises? 

Chester shot another glance over their shoulder, but the Burger King was gone. 

Maybe it was just a dream. It was early and Chester was shaken up. Disturbed and anxious, they put the thought out of their mind and hurried to catch the train. Everything would be fine.

After the odd sighting with their ex, Chester went on about their day, deciding to make the most of it. Their job entailed not only dealing with but cheering up quite a bit of children and it was quite possibly the only perk of being Ronald Mcdonald. Yes, they were screaming snot-nosed little brats as their friends, and even coworkers liked to say, but kids were innocent. They didn’t know any better and they cried because they didn’t know how to express their own emotions in palatable ways for society yet. Laughing to themself as they remembered the almost breakdown from this morning and the tears of frustration that had helplessly risen, Chester could relate. 

Maybe that was why they liked kids and most people didn’t. Kids hadn’t been taught how to conform to societal expectations yet, so they were honest reflections of whoever raised them.

Chester didn’t think most people could handle the truth about themselves.

As the Ronald McDonald mascot, Chester and their cheery disposition traveled between Mcdonald’s stores and acted as a marketer, a babysitter, a clown, a chef, a cashier, and an actor, all often simultaneously to create the best possible experience for all those who dined within the Mcdonald’s franchise chain. They cheered up crying children, sold products, monitored and soothed babies, fed toddlers, and calmed upset parents. They were genius and they’d be the first to admit it. They’d also be the first to admit that this was the worst job in existence and no one in their right mind should work here. It was a miserable position where you were held liable if anything happened to the children under your care as you unofficially babysat them after their exhausted, half-dead parent begged you to watch their toddlers for five seconds so they could.

Of course, Chester always said yes, because ultimately there wasn’t any way they could refuse and still keep the family as loyal patrons of Mcdonald’s, but sometimes things happened. Sometimes things internally combusted and blew on a nice spring day. The explosion would ruin everything and turn all the clouds gray, turn the warm sun into cold rain, and the fat droplets of Chester’s own repressed anger and grief and bitterness would fall to the floor as sadness, inescapably lost. The day would turn into a waterfall of emotions, a Niagara falls of trauma, and deep-seated spontaneous combustion of too many things not dealt with soon enough coupled with bitterness and fury ripe for anyone’s taking.

That was what was happening now. The Burger King had stood right in front of Chester, both of them in character, and with a grin that whispered nothing but violence, had calmy picked up one of the chaotic toddlers that those parents had needed a break from, and walked right out the door. 

There was nothing Chester could do. Absolutely nothing. They couldn’t leave the kids alone. But Chester knew if the kid’s parents came back, they would be furious that Chester had just let the Burger King walk right out the door without even attempting to save their child. They wouldn’t understand how scary the guy was, the kind of damage, he could do, that that was why the two of them had broken up. Chester knew the kind of fear that they had felt while fucking the Burger King was not a normal fear; it was deep anxiety that at any moment, the King might snap. The King was like a rubber band, stretched too tight; at any moment it would snap and hurt everything in its path and Chester had never been the exception.

Their indecisiveness cost them everything.

By the time they’d decided to leave the children with a cashier and run after the King, it had been too long. The King had gotten bored and upon approaching the alleyway Chester had seen the King run down, they saw blood. And they knew, at that instant, that their world had imploded and the world’s most traumatic waterfall roared on.

**_Present_ **

Chester was mostly just confused as they stared at Tinky’s body, at the scraps of flesh and pulverized bone and brain matter and-

The panic was starting to set in now. The shock was fading and now Chester was reeling, grappling around, reaching out onto everything they could for dear life, begging for life to stop in its tracks so they coil process. But the demon continued, shoving Chester back into a wall as they stumbled too close to the body. His stupid fucking cloak was soaked with blood and the crown was in pieces, shattered. It was a perfect representation of what was happening here.

It had started as one stupid fucking affair. A hookup after a long day and fights with Tinky. Chills running down their spine, an electrifying gravity as they’d locked eyes. As Chester hit the wall behind them, they’d remembered the way the shorter man had pushed them against the wall that first time, their lips locking in a breathless heat. They’d forgotten they could feel like that, and now, in the moment, watching their former lover, no, former affair, tear their husband to pieces, they remembered what they’d liked about the King. The King had been able to make them feel something that no one else could.

Chester couldn’t help but laugh out loud at the thought, but the sound was hoarse and strangled as the bitter chuckle turned into an angry sob and Chester pushed themself off the wall onto the balls of their feet and dashed forward, daring to meet the King on his own turf.

They were in the same alleyway the child had been ripped to pieces just hours earlier. It was a horrifying and brutal crime and just thinking about it had made Chester sick. Seeing it had been even worse. Chester knew exactly what Tinky had been doing in this part of town. They’d known about the King and the affair; and although the marriage had started to recover, the hatred Tinky had felt for the King had never faded. Chester guessed that Tinky had heard about the child on the news and had recognized the King’s handiwork. They’d ventured to Chester’s part of town to not only keep them safe, even after everything, but to exact their revenge. But it didn’t matter now. After all, look how far that had gotten the two of them. Tinky was fucking dead and Chester was having, by far, the worst fucking day of their life.

They picked up a random piece of pipe metal that had lied on the ground nearby, slick with blood. Chester felt vaguely ill and they knew if they thought too much about where that scrap copper had been and what it had seen, Chester would break down and lose their nerve, it would all be over, and Tinky would still be gone. They put the thought out of their mind and raised the hollow pipe above their head in one fluid motion and brought it down onto the King’s face.

Well, they’d meant to bring it down on his face, but the King’s reflexes had kicked in and Chester had brought it down upon the King’s upturned palm and wrist with a devastating and sickening crack. Letting out a short scream, and a cry of anger, the King rose from where they’d been devouring Tinky’s body and let a mouthful of shredded flesh fall to the ground in shock and anger. A wave of bile rose in Chester’s throat, and as The King reached out for them, Chester brought down the pipe, again and again, not caring where it landed. They didn’t care what cracked and what broke or about any of the King’s screams. They didn’t give the King a chance to fight back and they beat the disgusting man into the ground where he belonged. 

The King crumpled, even as they rose, over and over and over again, and finally, when he stopped rising, when he laid on the ground, dead, beaten, bloody, Chester realized they had been sobbing. They had been sobbing and screaming. Their throat was painful and scratchy and they realized they had also probably been screaming. They fell to their knees, falling into the warm, wet blood emanating from their dead lovers, and allowed themself to cry. Finally. Not in blind waves of panic or tears of frustration or sobs of anger. They allowed tears of grief and heaving chest sobs as they cried for what they had done. They cried for themself, they cried for their relationship, for their dead partner, for the child, and for how fucked it all was. They allowed themself to grieve into emotional exhaustion, their yellow and white pinstripes echoing across blood-soaked netherlands. 

Chester knew they’d needed to get out of there before the police arrived, as they would be implicated, so they trudged further along into the alley, crying again as they stepped over Tinky Winky’s lifeless body. They stopped for a moment, pressing a kiss to the Teletbby’s chest, and the continued, grieving what they’d had and what they could have been,

Chester’s eyes hardened and their own fangs bared themselves against the setting sun. The night would come, the king would rise once more, and everything the slimy little shit had ever loved would pay. Among the orange flickered streetlights, flecks of blood coating everything Chester owned, contouring their devastatingly beautiful features, the infamously powerful vampire, Chester Lockhart, looked like your worst nightmare. 

Some people got love stories. 

The King was getting a horror movie. 

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
